I understand. This is not timely at all. An article about PREDATORS? A movie that’s been in theaters since July 9th? I saw it opening weekend and have been thinking about it since and well, here it is.
PREDATORS is the supposed relaunch of the original PREDATOR franchise that was spoiled by a ill chosen cinematic trip to New York and then refurbished into a gore fest through the subsequent battles of the ALIENS VS PREDATOR films. That franchise never grew beyond the B grade monster movie genre. Not too shocking there.
Robert Rodriguez of EL MARIACHI and SPY KIDS fame had been working on a proper sequel to PREDATOR for some time now. That’s great to hear. The original PREDATOR is a classic. My first viewing, I was young and frightful. The gore felt real. The suspense of the Predator’s red dots tracking our heroes, floating across the forest, landing center forehead always caught me on the verge of closing my eyes since I knew what those little red dots meant. Someone was going to get blown the hell up.
After years of watching it on VHS then DVD the suspense has diminished slightly and the shock of skinned men dangling from trees and exploding bodies has gone. No big deal, I still watch it. I'll pop it in the player late at night and watch it once again, but now for the humor. It had always been there but as a kid I was too aware of the blood and guts, that came first. I just wanted to watch Arnold run around the jungle trying to save his buddies, guns blazing. But now I watch PREDATOR for the characters that these awesome actors gave life to. I watch for the handshake between Dutch and Dillon that goes on for far too long. It’s everlasting. I shout along to the string of one-liners from Blain and Dutch.
Everyone knows, “Get to the choppa!”
The characters speak in quotes that in certain circles are still spoken with enthusiasm.
“There’s something out there, and it ain’t no man.”
The original filmmakers and actors created characters that we want to spend more time with and put them in a world that we’ve never seen before. A simple adventure story dropped into the jungle with man hunting aliens. The combination of straight forward story telling with personality has been the hallmark of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s career since CONAN THE BARBARIAN, and why on any given weekend afternoon you will find one of his films on cable. “Movies for Guys Who Like Movies,” TBS’s movie segment from the ‘90s, owes a debt of gratitude to Schwarzenegger and his ilk for keeping their library stocked with explosions and classic performances.
The new characters in PREDATORS lack the likability and charm of the original. Likability and charm is a must for an action film, something that was proven in the 1980s where names alone like Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, and Bruce Willis guaranteed great action, fights, explosions, and most of all – great characters. You can go further back to THE GREAT ESCAPE and THE DIRTY DOZEN for action films with likable and charming characters, so it was proven long before the '80s, I just happen to like the ‘80s films the best.
The draw to most audiences is the predator itself. A reptilian beast. A trophy hunter and a savage with jowls of fangs. Frightening still. The error in the later Predator films was focusing solely on the creature. The creature hunts, kills, and mutilates. That’s a great visual but it needs to be surrounded by compelling characters we want to see live, that we want to see destroy the alien beast.
In the retooled PREDATORS the characters are all the savages of earth. Mercenaries and assassins. Rapists and military thugs. They have all killed innocent people back home and now must defend themselves from being killed as a trophy by the predators. All I could ask myself was why do we care? They deserve their deaths and what’s even worse, not one of them has any charm. They’re all straight faced paid killers who the audience has no connection to. Or at least I didn’t. I wanted to. I wanted Adrien Brody to smile at least once, puff on a stogie and say something hilarious.
When he danced around the fire covered in mud shouting out to the forest, “I’m here! Kill me! Do it now!” my heart lifted. I smiled. It was an Arnold moment I loved and here it was again, because someone involved in this new film had an inkling as to what true PREDATOR fans wanted. Not old scenes written verbatim, but a sense of liveliness and fun in these characters. We want the personality that Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jesse Ventura, and Carl Weathers brought to the roles they were given. Adrien Brody is definitely a great actor who has been charming in past roles but played this role straight. He got in shape and prepared as if he really was a mercenary, which I respect, but somewhere between script and screen the fun and energy that his lead character should have had went missing. I’ll have to read the script to see if it was ever there.
All the other elements of the original film are there. The tone and atmosphere are spot on with just the right amount of action and suspense. With Robert Rodriguez producing as well as writing it is surprising that he didn’t attempt to create characters that would match the style of the original performances. In PREDATORS each character is stiff, trite, empty stereotypes and the actors hired didn’t infuse anything interesting into what was on the page. Is it the writer’s fault, the actor’s fault? My fault? Am I trying to see this movie as something it wasn’t meant to be? Did the creators do exactly what they set out to do? A dour adventure story with characters in a hopeless situation? By stripping away any personality and fun from the characters they created a viewing experience where you’re seeing characters that are depressing and have no chance of survival. There is no lightness here, just dark.
This film has been out for weeks now so there is no reason to avoid spoilers, but I just don’t want to get into the plot holes of PREDATORS. They’re there and they’re annoying. We went for beers after the showing and tore the movie apart pretty easily, and the only thing about it that absolutely didn’t sit well with me was the treatment of the characters. It was a solid film and I’ll buy the DVD when it comes out in an attempt to make it become part of my repertoire of re-watched films, but I am afraid it won’t make it. There’s no one to root for, no character you wish to be. No dialogue to laugh with or laugh or. No lines worth repeating to friends.
It’s an odd thing in art, where the audience can over look obvious plot holes or other flaws in a piece if there is something that they connect with. For everyone it’s something different. Me, I connect with characters. With actors. PREDATORS failed on this part and it shouldn’t have. Watch the original and try to picture it with any other lead than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It wouldn’t have the energy, charm, or humor. It would be soldiers being hunted by an alien. Bland and lifeless. Arnold’s personality lifts it beyond an action based science-fiction film into something greater. A classic.
NOTE: I hope Arnold retires from politics and returns to movie making. No one comes close to replicating what he does on screen. That man’s engaging and constantly fun to watch. Total Recall 2 perhaps?
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